A letter to present me, from future me. 

When you have a list of things to do and two sleeping toddlers

Dear Jenn,

Let me tell you a little bit about what’s been going on in your life. 

You are 68 years old. That means that Elsie is 34, Dorothy is 32, and Roland is 31. You don’t know this yet but you had 2 more children, Charlie who is now 29 and Grace who is 28. 

You’re a grandmother of 5! Elsie and Roland have both married and have had children of their own, 4 of which were born at home. Elsie is a home birth midwife in NYC. Dorothy is dating and just announced her engagement to be married this fall. She is a high school teacher, just like her aunt Deb. Roland followed in his dad’s footsteps and he is one of the best engineers in the tri-state area. Charlie is still not sure what he wants to do for his career and currently works as an office manager. Your sweet Grace is studying to be a nurse, just like her Aunt Jenn. 

You and your husband have been traveling across the country for the past month. You are still so in love with each other. You spend countless hours playing cards and snuggling up on the couch. You have so much time to travel and it’s almost as if you’re newlyweds again. 

Get it yet? It doesn’t last forever. Right now, as your children are 4, 2, and 1, it seems as if the days go by so fast. The house is never clean and the laundry is never done. Rarely are there compliments or graciousness, rather there are demands and tears. Your shirt is constantly being tugged on and half of your wardrobe has milk stains. Most days you wonder if you brushed your teeth. Taking a long shower is not an option, and neither is peeing when you have to go. Everything you need can wait, as the needs of your family always come first. 

It doesn’t last forever. 

There will come a time when you will miss being trampled on by tiny feet and drooling mouths. A time where you will long for a sloppy kiss or a tiny hand in yours. There will be hope for just one more minute talking on the phone with your children instead of hiding from them in a closet to get in a quick conversation with the credit card company. Instead of hastily eating their cold leftover breakfast, you will have all of time in the world to eat…

There will come a time where you wake up in the morning and there will not be a child nestled in your nook. 

There will be a time where you will need them more than they need you. 

So, cuddle up, mama. Treasure these moments. Eat the cold macaroni and cheese. Walk past the pile of dishes for a few moments to nurse your toddler on the couch. Jump in the puddles. Hold on to every moment you’re given. 

Be ok with it. It will not last forever. ❤️

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